Viewpoint FROM THE CHIEF MEDICAL EDITOR

Sign Language

Larry E. Patterson, M.D.

"Sign, sign, everywhere a sign
Blockin' out the scenery, breakin' my mind
Do this, don't do that, can't you read the sign?"
Lyrics to "Signs," by Five Man Electrical Band, 1970

It has been said that the happiest day in a man's life is the day he buys his new boat. The second happiest is the day he sells it. I have experienced both days of happiness. During my active boating days, I read a boating magazine editorial that complained about the excessive number of warning labels found on boats. New boats are so covered in warning labels that the net effect on boat owners is to pretty much ignore them all. All of the warnings are valid, such as "Don't stick body parts into a running propeller," but there are just so many stickers all over the boats that they've lost their value.

My office is beginning to look like a boat.

In the entryway, we are required by law to display a number of posters. One alerts victims of violence — domestic, dating and age-related — to a toll-free number for help. Another gives information on elder abuse services. Yet another lists remedies for folks troubled by Tennessee's Medicaid program, TennCare.

When you sign in, you receive our "Notice of Privacy Practices" sheet, a silly bit of information that essentially states that our practice has agreed to obey the law. Upon entering our surgery center, you'll encounter more of the same posters and notices.

Not even my staff is immune from this onslaught of government-mandated informational notices. My lounge has one of those ubiquitous-to-medical-offices posters found in break rooms across the nation. One poster conveniently has 12 separate mini-posters with topics ranging from child labor laws to the Employee Polygraph Protection Act.

Don't get me wrong. Much of the information in any of these posters is certainly valuable to someone at some time. But one could easily argue that there are dozens, if not hundreds of other pieces of information about life and medicine that could be equally important. For example, "Don't drive after being dilated!"

When are we going to wake up and realize that because of this recent information proliferation, no one reads any of these notices, warnings, and proclamations of our rights?

I asked my receptionist Ashley about this. In the last 3 years she's worked for me, she's never seen even one person stop to read the posters. So unfortunately, as is the case with the the boat stickers, if we ever have something really important to post, it will just get ignored with all the rest!